A Mamma Bear On A Mission...

We've all been abnormally tired lately.  Could be the pollen tsunami, could be the craziness that May and June bring with it, or it could be the stress of my mother in law's health, but regardless, we're exhausted.  Maintaining balance is especially tricky and not snapping at the end of the day can be damn near impossible.  The other day I went to bed and just laid there waiting for sleep to take over, when I heard a scuffle in the living room.  As the laughter started and I knew Tony was trying to lift Youngest off the couch in an effort to get him to go to bed.

As he lifted him, laughing he said,"Geez!  What do you have, bricks in your ass???"  My son, without skipping a beat, regained his footing and said "Why? Did you lose some from your head?"

Sense of humor is important folks.  It's the most effective glue that we have in our family, and one that we've utilized more and more lately in holding it all together.

My mother in law is still in the nursing home, discussing options of coming home, which would be wonderful if any of us had the ability to care for her, which currently we do not.  With the influx of summer tourists, travel to see her can sometimes make the normal 1.5 hour ride 3 hours.  And on days like today, when traffic is backed up 14 miles or more, it is quite simply not an option.  She is doing better, her chest tubes draining less fluid each day.  Her CHF has leveled off again and we are unsure of where she stands on resuming her cancer treatments.  Without any additional information, it seems as though she will go back to her status quo.  It's the not knowing that's eating Tony, the uncertainty of her condition and the lack of answers.  He normally puts off stressful things, shoves worry aside and pushes through, but the uncertainty of it is a stress he can not shake.  He's exhausted beyond words, struggling to do things he loves. For lack of better words, he's depressed.

His car is older and the costs of repairing it have started outweighing not having a payment.  We knew the day was coming and he's been looking at trucks.  Which, as we soon found out, everyone on the planet also seems to be looking at.  The pool of trucks that fit our needs within our price range looks like more of a puddle.  Yet, on Saturday we found one that the finance guy assured us he could get within his preferred payment range.  A test drive and half a day of working numbers, running the carfax, and pulling reviews later, they could not.  Which depressed him even further.

Then, this morning his computer stopped working.

*sigh*

So I did what any wife would do.  I got up and made his favorite omelet.  I took a shower and asked Oldest to fix his computer. I told him I was taking his car to NTB to see if we could fix some of the issues it had, and then to Walmart.  And when NTB said it would be another $1200 to fix the brakes, I headed to yet another dealership.  I sat for 2 hours, worked the numbers, had his car appraised, and tomorrow he comes home with his new truck, with a payment he can afford. Then, I bought him lunch.  And while it was a hefty (and necessary) price to pay, he's smiling again, and for the first time in a long time I can see hope in his eyes.

Was it the best time to do this?  Who knows.  Was I right to lie about where I was going and take all the "fun" out of car shopping and negotiating away from him? Depends on who you ask.  Was it hard to tell Bonus Brother he will not be getting Tony's old car?  Yes, but it was the safer thing to do.  The one thing I do know is that sometimes you have to look disappointment in the face and tell it "Not today."  Sometimes you just have to hand it all over to the mamma bear...

... and get the hell out of her way.